 Chortler Features
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TECH
Gates Contends Case Hampers His Ability to Be Worldâs First Trillionaire
Bill Gates took the stand Monday at the Microsoft antitrust case arguing that the states case against him will severely hinder his chances of becoming the worldâs first trillionaire.
Gates testified that the penalties sought by nine states would undermine the average Americanâs ability to watch him grow even more exceedingly rich than anybody else who has ever lived.
The states are led by what many Microsoft insiders deem to be an "axis of evil," including Massachusetts, California and the wickedest of them all, Florida.
"Arenât we forgetting a little something here?" Gates pleaded at the trial. "This case has become more about opening up markets and the consumerâs right of choice and less about me."
"You try raising your kids on less than a hundred billion these days," Gates added passionately.
Much of Gatesâ case also rests on the argument that financial channels, such as CNBC and CNNfn, will have nothing to talk about if his net worth continues to stagnate.
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