Friday, April 06, 2007 05:31:12 AM
LATE LATE
Craig Ferguson On Keith Richards, Sanjaya and Scottish Sex
Jokes from THE LATE LATE SHOW WITH CRAIG FERGUSON monologue for April 5, 2007
Keith Richards is in terrible trouble, isnât he? First he said he had snorted his father then he said he didnât.
And now Disney is saying we are mad at ya cause heâs in their new âPirates of Caribbeanâ movieâ¦
What did you expect? Itâs Keith Richards. Heâs a self-confessed heroin addict who plays guitar
with the Rolling Stonesâ¦
And anyways the last movie had cannibals in it. Apparently itâs ok to eat people, not snort them.
There is a radio DJ out there somewhere living on the roof of a car dealership and he wonât come down until Sanjaya is voted off.
Heâs concerned about the message weâre sending to our children by voting for Sanjaya.
This guy is living on the roof of a car dealership because he doesnât like a kid on a talent show!
What message are you sending to our children?
As kids instead of building sandcastles, weâd make sand sculptures of naked womenâ¦
It was tricky though, cause we didnât know what naked women looked like. I grew up in Scotland in the 1970âs.
I was 24 before I saw a woman with her coat off.
I thought a cardigan was an erogenous zone.
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