Updated daily because we have nothing better to do.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006 05:08:46 AM
COMEDY Craig Ferguson Talks About Britney Spears' Cat
Jokes from THE LATE LATE SHOW WITH CRAIG FERGUSON monologue for December 1, 2006
The L.A. Auto Show started today.
This year the hybrid cars all the rage. I donât really know what a hybrid car is.
Part car, part robot.
The car companies donât really understand what hybrids are supposed to be either.
They donât know they are supposed to be eco-friendly.
âThis Hybrid runs on gasoline and baby seals. Itâs for the new millennium.â
Do you know why I like going to auto shows, for the concept cars. The mockup cars of the future.
Itâs a big shiny car youâll never get to drive cause theyâll never make it.
Itâs kinda like going to a strip club: âItâs a big shiny woman youâll never get to have sex with.â
What else is going on? Oh yes Kramer, yes still in the news this week as well.
When this all started on Monday, I would have laid money down that heâd be in rehab by nowâ¦
If celebrities stop blaming alcohol, start taking personal responsibility for their craziness,
the rehabs will go out of business.
Itâs getting cold for LA. If it gets any colder,
Britney Spears is going to have to start wearing underpants.
Went on ABC News website today and they are calling Britney âThe panty-less menace.â
Why are reporters even covering this?...
Arenât there things going on in the world?
âYes, today in Iraq, the fighting intensified⦠hold on.
Breaking news. Britney Spears. Britney Spearsâ cat spotted getting out of limo.â
â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦..Oh, itâs not a cat.â
