Tuesday, January 10, 2006 05:45:59 AM
ADVICE
Dick Cheney Answers Your Stupid Questons
Dear Dick,
I have been listening in on people's
phone conversations without their knowledge.
And, what's worse, it turns out nobody has even
one nice thing to say about me. Help.
- George
Dear George,
Can you tap into the phones of Kentucky Fried Chicken? I'm dying to know
what those original herbs and spices are.
Dear Dick,
Whoops! I seem to have forgotten to supply
the America military with adequate armor.
As a matter of fact, this whole venture into
Iraq has turned into a complete disaster. What
should I do?
- Donald R
Dear Donald,
Relax. Why do you keep taking things like this
so seriously? I don't.
Dear Dick,
I am a deadbeat dad. I have no serious job prospects.
I am a total burden on my wife. In fact, I am a complete
failure in everything I do. Please advise.
- Kevin Federline
Dear Kevin,
You've lost me. Since when has being a complete failure
stopped anyone from achieving a position
of authority? Say, for example, president
of the United States.
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