Updated daily because we have nothing better to do.
Wednesday, June 15, 2005 07:30:20 AM
SPACE Earth-like Planet Discovered
American astronomers announced yesterday that they have discovered a planet similar to our own which orbits the star Gliese 876 15 light
years away in the direction
of the Aquarius constellation. The scientists made the following observations which would
indeed seem to verify the new planet's similarity to Earth:
- the new planet was obsessed with the child
molestation trial of the biggest pop star in its history.
- the president of its largest nation cannot under any
circumstances pronounce the word 'nuclear'.
- nobody over there can figure out how to get the clocks on their
VCRs to work, either.
- one of its leading actors has an inexplicable tendency to throw telephones at hotel employees.
- nobody really cares about the love life of another of its
leading actors no matter how much he jumps up and down on television.
- its online satire writers come up with lamer upon lamer themes every day.
American astronomers announced yesterday that they have discovered a planet similar to our own which orbits the star Gliese 876 15 light
years away in the direction
of the Aquarius constellation. The scientists made the following observations which would
indeed seem to verify the new planet's similarity to Earth:
