Updated daily because we have nothing better to do.
Tuesday, December 21, 2004 07:51:57 PM
NATION FCC Launches National Don't-Look-At-Me-Like-That List
Given the overwhelming success of the nation's do-not-call registry, the Federal Communication Commission is proud to announce the beginning of our national don't-look-at-me-like-that list.
Now people throughout the country will be spared from potential marketers whose very glance is replete with the intent of trying to sell something.
Yes, by signing up today Americans can now be protected from the looks of everyone from panhandlers to real-estate agents, financial consultants to fast-food workers.
But it doesn't stop there. The list also extends to friends and family. You'll also be shielded from mooching friends, deadbeat teenagers and extravagantly spending spouses.
We are positive this new endeavor will produce the results we are hoping for, and we look forward to introducing further measures down the road, such as the don't-pass-me-the cauliflower list, the don't-break-wind-in-my-general-direction initiative, and finally the don't-play-Barry-Manilow-so-loud-that-I-can-hear-it registry.
